Evil Diesel Submarine Pirate Swag
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It’s on the internet, so it must be legit:
Kapolei, HI, May 21, 2010 – GNA Worldwide subsidiary Malum.org, home of the impeccable novella Tall Tales of Felony and Failure (TTFF), proudly announces its recent partnering with Wild Child Publishing. This marriage combines Wild Child Publishing’s professionalism with Malum.org’s world renown Intellectual Property, and dovetails nicely with the opening of the most aggressive Malum.org Online Retail Division project yet, the Submarine Pirate Shop.
When asked to comment, William Taker, Malum.org’s Under Registrant of Over Compensation, responded, “This partnership allows Malum.org, a GNA Worldwide subsidiary, to benefit from the additional income generated through sales of our sad, sad tale by Wild Child Publishing without assuming any of the financial risk associated with actually producing things. Wild Child “Famous” Publishing, meanwhile, may now enjoy the staggering notoriety associated with the fine, fine TTFF brand. This strategy is eerily reminiscent of our similar partnering with Spreadshirt Inc., resulting in the wildly successful Submarine Pirate Shop. It’s a complete win-win for each company involved, and we’re all excruciatingly excited.”
Continue reading Official Press Release – FOR IMMEDIATE DISTRIBUTION
The official publish of our fantastical tale is months away, so I’ve decided to satiate your need with a bit from Chapter 3. As always, please pardon the formatting. We don’t understand the WordPress that well.
Does it get better than this? God, I hope so. Gray outside, no sun yet. I look through the windshield of Tom’s truck. I’m in the parking lot behind the barracks. Naked, lying down in the front seat, dried patches of blood about. One of my eyes is caked shut. I try to remember how this happened.
Slowly, coming back. All of it coming back. The Filipina, the bloody bouncer, the broken cue stick, the free money. Frozen time.
I ponder this. Frozen time? Reaching under the seat, I pull out my clothes: sneakers, underpants, shirt, and pants. I’m still wearing Tom’s cap, which is glued to my head, and my socks are still on.
Continue reading A small bit of Chapter 3
New, Official Tall Tales of Felony and Failure Cover!
It’s true, rookies! Following some (I’d imagine) significant editorial manipulation, Tall Tales of Felony and Failure will be published by Wild Child Publishing! We’ve already finished and formalized the new cover (quite a stretch from the original, I’d say!), but much needed editing will push the publish [...]
Actually, just a comment by my new main man swedgin. But a positive comment, and such things tend to snowball toward Decisive Victory!
An Outstanding Review!
The best book Mr. Swedgin has read this year! (I realize it’s only February, but I’ll assume he/she meant the last twelve months.) I’m sure this implies greatness, and I’ll try [...]
The ‘Tall Tales of Felony and Failure’ Page has gone Live at Facebook! To the pleasure of all, I’m sure.
Feel free to join and invite your friend(s) – Nothing gained, but [...]
22 April 2010 Update: Sorry, lads and ladies, but the free versions have been removed from this site. Tall Tales of Felony and Failure has found a publisher!
It’s true, it’s true. Tall Tales of Felony and Failure is now available in multiple eBook formats for your FREE DOWNLOADING PLEASURE!!!
By multiple, I mean two. For Amazon Kindle [...]
A bold new experiment. Chapter 1 of TTFF as read by the author, a miserable wretch of a human being. Quality is low, as per the norm. The price, though, is better than right. More to follow, hopefully improved as we struggle toward understanding how this computer recording action works. (If anyone has any skill at reading and/or recording such reading and would like to assist in this effort, for much credit but absolutely no pay, please contact us.)
Download TTFF Audio Chapter 1 (215)
Continue reading Audible Failure Now Available
Cranston and Tom trudge off toward the crash site, a line of torn earth and trees three football fields long. What remains of the fuselage is crumpled, still smoldering and partially buried at its front end. They walk the length of the wreckage’s path, occasionally picking through the debris. They stay [...]
Welcome all to malum.org! This is Warren Haustrumerda’s official home to the gentle story TALL TALES OF FELONY AND FAILURE, a cautionary tale of lost love and unrepentant generosity, ending (as always) in piracy and death. It’s available FREE for your perusal as an Adobe Acrobat download and in eBook formats (for those of [...]
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Evil Diesel Submarine Pirate Swag
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