Mar 062009
 

I’ve just quit smoking, and the last five hours have been a little edgy, so please forgive any shortness or expletives.  That said, I’ve recently purchased Silent Hunter III (it’s been out for about four years) and am having a fantastic, while insanely frustrating, time playing it.

Fantastic, because you assume the role of a steely jawed, German speaking U-Boat skipper during WWII, wrath-handed and doom-leading.  If you captain well, your wake will fill with oil, fire, and death.

Frustrating, because my particular captaining skills apparently lack.   ‘ANGLE ON THE BOW?  WHO GIVES A SHIT?  SHOOT THE BASTARD!’  Well, sinking even huge, slow moving allied tankers, even from less than 3000 yards, isn’t that easy with unguided steam powered torpedoes if you don’t do the math and appropriately set all of your torpedo-computer-knob-things.  Or just change the game settings so all of that’s automatic (I later found out).

Overall, though, I’m having a good time with the game.  I bought it for $9.95 on Steam, but it’s also available for the same price here and here.  A fantastic mod is available as a direct downloand or torrent, and there’s also a great forum for the game.  Make sure you grab the v1.4b patch if the version you download isn’t already updated.

The game requirements state Windows XP/2000 only, but the Steam version runs fine on our Vista box, so I imagine the other download versions would, also.  YMMV.

There’s also a multiplayer option which I haven’t had a chance to try yet.  The PATIENCE‘s damn internet mast is on the fritz (get it?  Fritz!), preventing extended connectivity (I’ll be lucky to finish this post).  I’ll try to herd up some of the guys for a LAN match (after I get better at the game), though, and will report out with a full review after we’ve beaten the game into submission.

Silent Hunter IV is also available, but it’s not $9.95, so piss on it.

Finally, GODDAMN DUD TORPEDOES – BOUNCE OFF OF THEIR HULL WHEN I FINALLY SCORE A HIT, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?  I THOUGHT THE GERMANS ALWAYS MAKE GOOD STUFF!

UPDATE: I cannot, with any integrity (as though there’s a lot of that laying about), provide a full review since I lack the patience to get into the full meat of the game.   Some pros/cons from my limited experience, though:

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